Tag Archive | fear of pain

Screaming At The Top Of My Voice


“Saw the world turning in my sheets,  and once again I cannot sleep”

Losing some ground in a fight to keep a life

Fighting to stay in control of the progress made over many mountains and turning tides.

Forgetting the panic that sets me aside

forgetting the fear

 Am not in charge.

Never was.

Walking down the streets of options and second chances.

Am not in charge

Fighting the knee-jerk reactions to the enemy

Instead needing the heavenly place we look to tend our selves.

Wishing for stars to ride on through the storms.

There is no place left feeling to go. No option that will leave the enemy at the door.

Remembering the rights that are now proving to seem so wrong.

“My mind is muddy, my heart heavy , does it show?”

Feeling as if losing track of that loses me, having choices taken away.

Am not in charge.

And some thing sent into fight has lost its worth, leaving in its place a hollowness that defies

still comes back and threatens in the night.

Pain has been my enemy, said to be in the fight of my life

Not asking for a second chance at life, just let this one not be full of such strife

Screaming at the top of my voice.

“Give me reason, but don’t give me choice?

I’ll take choice,and throw reason for another season.

I’ll make the same mistakes again

Pain Free Days, someday we will meet

“Maybe talk but not speak”

“I’m not asking for a second chance”

Not buying the promise,

Cause there is no promise that pain can keep.

“And the reflection troubles me”

Am not in charge. Never was.

“And so here I go….”

Morning Star Hear me roar!

©tjhelser  2012