Being reminded of you…. still….
It’s the dark o’clock early morning hours that have become empty, and I am reminded again how I wish there could be one more song.
So this is it….
I still miss the hours we shared when the rest of the world seemed absent, my 3am was a time of music, intelligent conversations and inspiring challenges that without had left a hollowness I could not wrap my mind around. Let alone my heart.
But I am accepting now that you’re gone. Though it’s not been easy to hide… this pain inside…the anger is gone now too….like you.
I think I found the words… I think I can say now…to you.
Maybe there is a reason you came sweeping into my life on white shirt-tails of music we both were passionate about, on cascading words that both inspired and challenged me. Maybe I am the writer I am today because of those dark o’clock interchanges of vulnerable intelligence.
Maybe I grew in that environment of raw emotions and challenged feelings by you. Yet, strange how that can make people feel what they’d rather not. I continue to wonder if that’s why you went away again, this time, our final parting.
It will be two years soon and I am grateful that the emptiness is finally being released in ways that I would not have dreamed when you left.
The gifts you gave me shall remain in my heart and in all my words, for those moments shared impact me still.
I thought you should know.