Music had to be part of that. And just as my refrigerator affirmation stated, music is healing my soul.
Recreating my life as an independent woman and building a sanctuary I call home became a priority that took the best part of 14 months. Yet it seems like it was just yesterday I gulped down the fear I was encountering, by making changes that not only affected me, but also affected others there were days that seemed would never end.
There have been really high points this last year, as well as some really low points. Yet today I cannot find enough hours in the day for all I want to accomplish. Finding time to do “IT ALL” has not been successful. In fact, NOT finding enough time for writing for LBB, two other blogs, my novel, as well as not having the time for blog-hopping has become more my norm in the last year. Despite telling myself that more of my attention could be focused on writing and visiting this community I still find stretched thinly by the end of the day. (Not a bad thing.)
Reinventing my life has taken priority, and I’m feeling really blessed by those who in my life who “ get it” and support me, despite that I’m not being the attentive friend that I typically am.
It’s been a strange dichotomy, slowly processing this reinvention while time seems to whiz right by. Recognizing that this whole process could never be anything but in the universe’s timing has helped me to embrace this past year. Making life altering changes was not something I had ever planned on doing at this stage of my life, who does?
I’ve discovered that as frightening as it just plain was at times if I had remained where I was I would have been merely existing, not living as authentically and fully; not as I have studied my entire adult life to do. I couldn’t turn my back on that anymore, pretending that everything was just peachy-keen-hunky-dory, when it wasn’t. Learning that letting go of what I had wished for but simply never was going to be was maybe the most difficult hurdle to get over.
To say that starting over at 50 plus years old is not at all an exaggeration. Long time LBB readers have been privy to my writing about the last two years. Two years that involved so many changes, and created so many emotions; albeit I often wrote in veiled analogies. In complete transparency I can say that becoming single again after more than four decades has been an emotionally growing & fulfilling time for me. Not at all the negatives so many ‘warned’ me of. Personally my life i filled with a lot of contentment, and serenity. I’ve created a happy place to rest my feet at, and to lay my head upon.
Music Healing thy Soul ~
Work hard, trust and believe:
Apparently I have been in touch with my alter ego on almost a daily basis and we have been working hard without realizing it was anything but fun, and music .Friend’s have suggested that I stop being in denial about my alter ego. They suggest that I face the music, that I admit openly that I am…. merely a repressed disc jockey.
Well.. okay…the truth.
This is how I think: If I am listening to music everyone within hearing distance should be sharing in that music. I post music anywhere I’m allowed. So how wonderfully serendipitous for me that my involvement and passion for independent music will soon extend as well to radio. all that posting and writing about music drew attention. I’ve been offered a radio show of my own, I will be joining the family of DJ’s at Loop radio.net. Although this has not quite sunk in yet, or the details sorted out this past week has me feeling like my birthday came early this year.
So I wish to say; Thank you Sam Jones Kenny Darkreine (from Loop radio) So looking forward to your mentoring.